This Martin Luther King, Jr. weekend was spent close to home. I didn’t get out of bed before 9am for three days. I finally put a couple of extra blankets into one of those vacuum-seal bags and stuck it under the bed. As dinner simmered away in the slow cooker, I took out my bank statement, fired up my credit card app, and decided to take a close look at my finances.
The scribbles of a lunatic
I’d rather deep-clean the dark reaches of the cabinet under the kitchen sink than come face to face with my poor financial choices. My early successes at consuming less had me confident. It was time to face the music.
My student loan payments weren’t any more appalling than usual. My fiance and I rent a nice and affordable apartment, so that isn’t too bad. My gym membership is expensive, but I use it and enjoy it, so that stays. My share of the cable bill is high, but that’s to be expected. Do I still need Birchbox? Why don’t I pay my renter’s insurance in full every year instead of paying in monthly installments? Why don’t I ever remember to budget for my haircuts?
Once I’d tallied up my regular bills and income, I saw I had about $1,500 left every month. I’m certainly not saving that much. My credit card app helpfully breaks up a month’s expenses by category. I tallied up the totals on “Dining” for November and December. The average for those two months? More than $450 per month.
It was all downhill from here
Look at that idiot.
There I am, barely accustomed to my post-pubescent body. (I thought I was chunky then. I was the worst–look at that beauty! Anyway.) Glowing with consumeristic joy over the acquisition of both my first cellular phone that wasn’t drilled into the frame of an automobile and my first credit card. The ink was barely dry on my first private student loan and the federal loans that allowed me to pay the University of Rhode Island for my first year of college.
I’d worked babysitting jobs and a horrendous retail job and hadn’t lived away from home for more than a week in my life. Money had no long-term use for me; it was all about having enough to gas up my crappy car (easy enough in the halcyon days of a gallon of gas costing less than a gallon of bottled water) and some left over to buy a CD at Newbury Comics, and maybe some late-night diner breakfast at Bickford’s.
Fast forward about 15 years and the long-term consequences of my financial choices have become abundantly clear. I pay about $500 a month in student loans. (Sadly, a song compared to what some of today’s graduates have to face for their bachelor’s degree.) Over the years, I’ve been rent-poor. I’ve had to leave unsafe apartments or was asked to leave by roommates to make room for someone else. I worked a series of rewarding but low-paying jobs and tried to keep up with friends whose salaries were considerably higher than my own. I’ve had the unexpected stints of unemployment and little savings to cover it. It was manageable when I had one relatively low-limit credit card. But then I got a second in a foolish attempt to transfer a balance for a lower interest rate. Then my freelance gigs dried up during the recession. One day, I woke up and I had more than $10,000 in credit card debt.
That idiot’s chickens came home to roost.
Filed under Finance, Life